what a week. i got to the lowest low. it was a deep, dark, hallow drop. a free fall with emotions so big and heavy i couldn’t do anything but plunge deeper. darker. i had a choice. die… or live. made a therapy appointment. drank some water. called my friends. called my mom. read two […]

my number

this week has been all about the money. he wants my “number.” what’s it gonna take, rachel? how much do you want? i wish there was a number that would fix all this. a pile of cash that would end the worry. a dollar amount that would stop the hurt. how about 15? that’s the […]

some somethings

my kids have been gone for the past 9 days. 9. days. it’s the longest i’ve ever been apart from them. they flew all the way to phoenix by themselves to spend some time with my family. i, you see, am in no condition for (mostly) anything. so i stayed behind. on the way to […]

they don’t know mine

it’s out. the people have been told. family. kids. friends. pastor. we are getting a divorce. i obviously thought a LOT about the kids. how to tell them. how to make this easier. how to protect them. i read and i listened to tons of advice. it was hard. it was awful. but then they […]

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